*Winter*

Whether I like it or not, winter is upon us. There is snow on the ground, covering a layer of ice. Hats and mittens are now a necessary accessory, and this morning I pulled over to help push a car (with absolutely NO tread on its tires) up a very small hill. My knitting needles have seen lots of action - first, leg warmers for Rosemary, then a scarf for my mom, and now mittens for Rosemary.


The mittens are the most intricate items I have ever knitted and I have this to say: for a first pair of mittens, they're pretty good; but they definitely look like a first pair of mittens.

Christmas carols are ringing, my feet are happy in slippers, the tea kettle whistles often. I seem to be embracing a season I have dreaded since the end of last winter. I love the change of seasons, but last winter seemed marked an end to a season of my life that I was happy to say goodbye to, and I wasted a good amount of time worrying it would come back.

I’m beginning to realize that even though financial woes continue, infertility issues remain, there’s a light at the end of a very long tunnel and I don’t anticipate that light growing dark. I think I could be hit with a lot at this point in my life (though I’d really prefer not to) and it wouldn’t hurt as hard as it did a couple of years ago. I have less, I think I know less, I need less, I want less, and at the core of my being I feel so … happy.

There are moments like tonight where nothing particular is happening, but I feel butterflies in my stomach and tears well up in my eyes. I am learning to accept the little pleasures and appreciate the fleeting moments, and I truly believe it’s the greatest lesson one can learn. I still forget sometimes. But on days like this, when I remember, I feel like I am the most blessed in the world.